The Shot heard around the world!!!!!.......

Beta-Nurse Lisa

With great anticipation I read all of the starter kit literature and learned about Betaseron an its side affects. I thought It was a good fit for my particular form of MS called relapsing remitting, the most common type. However, the thought of being a human pin cushion was not very appealing to me. Reading that I needed shots every 2 days I felt faint. There was no way I can do this.

Inserting the DVD into the player I began to see how the injections are done with the instructional video provided. They had actual people with MS that give themselves shots so you can see proper technique. So I watched over and over until I thought I had it down pat. The manufacturer provides you with your own personal nurse called a Beta-nurse to come to you and train you via hands on for your first shot.

My appointment is made for my Beta-nurse to come to my sisters for my training the next week. After being in NY since January 7, I finally have answers, diagnosis, and am ready to start my treatment. Yea, my mental state of mind has leveled off and I can see clearly what needs to be done. "Take charge of my life again!!!" Is all I can think about now.

First step in gaining it back overcome the fear of needles and giving myself shots. I see other people do it, so can I. Or so I think.

The day finally comes for my nurse to show up for my training. The doorbell rings, with my heart pounding I answer expecting to see a hulking old lady with a white hat and uniform. But no, there was this small very nice younger women with a winter coat that smiled and said "Hi I'm Lisa your Beta-nurse are you Derek?" I reply "why yes, yes I am are you here to make me cry?" We both laughed as we sat down and started to discuss what I learned from the DVD and if I had any other questions.

With the cordials out of the way it was time to get down to business. The medicine comes pre-packaged with the needle and everything you need. All that's required is for you to do is mix it. She shows me how to draw it into the syringe making sure there is no bubbles. Once that is prepped it's shot time. "Hold on!" I told her "I don't like needles, I can't stand them". "No problem" she says and tells me to use the new betaject lite self administering tool that hides the needle. All you do is load it place the end on you skin and press the button.

With two practice loads and pretend shots with the Betajector done its my turn for real. My Sister, nieces, and other family members are in the room watching to cheer me on, its go time. All eyes were fixed on me as I stood and raised my shirt to give my first shot in my abdomen. I prep the area and hold the betaject with my sweaty hands and take a deep breath..... One, two, three press the button and "CLICK" it administers the shot. Counting to 15 to make sure the medicine is injected all the way I pull the needle out and it's done. The nieces cheered and sister clapped for me.

I did it!!! In that one moment I realized that this was real. I have MS and that I was in control of my life again! I know that it is not going to be easy in the long run but it sure is great having family and friends that care about you as much as you all do.

I read a great quote“ Make it a habit to tell people thank you. To express your appreciation, sincerely and without the expectation of anything in return. Truly appreciate those around you, and you'll soon find many others around you. Truly appreciate life, and you'll find that you have more of it.” Thanks to all for being so thoughtful and hopeful during this time for me and Roxanne.

Especially you Sister all my love from your "Big Brother" Derek Lee......

Stay tuned for my trip home friday March 27th.........

In the beginning there was the "BAD" news. Part II

My 2 hour plane ride and visit with Brandee's doctors was a definite step in the right direction. Per their advice my sister once again braved the snow and ice to drive me to see Dr.Latif in Watertown, NY for a new MRI and nerve conduction testing. Those of you not familiar with this test all I can say is never insult a Nazi or he will shock the shit out of you all under the guise of
" You need this done to test your nerves". I will ask any of you if you have ever touched an electric fence or possibly were stupid enough to stick a fork in an electrical socket? Well? Do you remember that?

I lay on the exam table in his office ready for the prodding to begin, my sister by my side for support. Dr. Latif asks "are you ready Derek?" I reply "only if you are!!". He places the probes on strategic areas of my arm to start and.... ZAP! The first jolt makes me jump almost off the table. Then ready for more... ZAP! my arm takes another hit. Ohhhhh man will I make it through this without passing out? I looked over at my sister and saw a look of horror then had to look at the wall so she would not see me tearing up in pain. Enduring shock after shock the doctor finally stopped and said the worst part was over and asked if I was ready for the needles. I laughed and said sure. Problem was he was not joking and proceeded with the needle procedure. I just laid there and tried to go to my "Happy Place".

I will spare you with more pain issues but be sure that needles equal pain. My sister being the consummate nurse she is was fascinated by the test asked lots of questions so she could relay them to me after I became more coherent. Thank god she was able to listen as I just stared at the wall unable to stop from thinking I just crapped myself. Another ewww moment of my life.

Dr. Latif stopped the testing short saying he would like me to have another MRI with a special dye to see more of my brain. Super another scan, but I felt very comfortable as he was very good explaining why he needed it. Off I go for the picture that would hold the true story of what is up.

MRI in hand I return to Dr. Latif's office for my consultation and findings appointment This time he asked me to sit in his office with him. Very cordially he said he did not like what he saw and proceeded to show me the scan on his computer pointing out several areas on my brain that he called lesions. Then the bad news "It's MS Derek, I'm sorry" he states to me. I felt sick to my stomach, with a huge welt starting in my throat I tried my best not to break down. He quickly tried to console me by telling me that my life was not over and that I was not going to die. Sure I thought to myself, that's easier to say than believe.

Sitting there stunned he asked if I would like another opinion and would be happy set it up for me with the MS center in Rochester if I would like. Of course I said yes to make sure. "I do not want to wait, lets do this" I tell him.

One more time my sister to the rescue. A few days later and a 3 hour drive we end up in Rochester to see Dr. Goodman the chief neurologist of the MS center there. This time no shocks or needles just test results. Well, the news did not get better. He concurs with Dr. Latifs findings and recommends I start treatment called DMD (Disease Modification Drug). He tells me several are available and I needed to speak with Dr. Latif to decide which is best for me.

Now I am scared to death and trying to learn as much as I can about the disease and what to expect from the drugs. I had lots of questions that I was hoping Dr.Latif would answer for me. Informing me about the options he recommended the DMD called Betaseron. http://betaseron.com/patients/about_betaseron/what_is_betaseron.jsp
It's an every 2 day shot that is self administered for the rest of my life that will help slow the progression but not stop the disease. I receive an info pack to read and watch a DVD to get started.

The Shot heard around the world!!!!!.......Next blog!!!!!!

In the beginning there was the "BAD" news.

Most of you know by now that I have been diagnosed with MS. http://www.nationalmssociety.org/about-multiple-sclerosis/what-is-ms/index.aspx . I will try to bring everyone up to speed with the process without boring you to much. If I do, I apologize in advance so feel free to skip to the end. This may take a couple of Blogs to do.

It all started last year in early summer with a cough that would not go away. After a few trips to the doctor to be told "It must be allergies... take these pills" I thought for sure all would be well. To my and Rox's dismay the cough did not get better but tiredness and fatigue were getting the better of me. So I went to doctor after doctor trying to figure out what was going on with me to no avail.

With so many visits under my belt Roxanne made a log sheet for me so I could keep track. I must tell you after 30 trips to the Doc's it was getting pretty old and very taxing on both of us. Answers, answers, answers was all that I was looking for. How hard could that be, really?

I never knew how hard it was going to get. It all came to light after parts of my body started to go numb and tingle with shooting pain. I thought this is not good!!! One morning It came to a head when the side of my face and neck started to go numb and I thought for sure I was having a stroke or something. I called my neighbor John and asked to be driven to the hospital. I heard a screech at the front of my house, my personal ambulance driver was there. Man that was fast service I thought to myself. Running red lights and cutting drivers off my expeditious driver and I arrived at the hospital without complications.

Admitted and confused I stayed for 5 days, tested, scanned, x-rayed and poked more times than a prostitute on Orange Blossom Trail I was ready to go home. The only answer I got was from the neurologist. It could be "MS" but he was not sure. "Go see another neurologist " is what he told me when I get out for more testing. Great, just what I needed more tests. I felt as though my world was ending. I just had a doctor tell me "maybe"... I might have this "thing" he was not sure. Not liking that at all my mental stability started a downhill spiral.

Not able to eat, nerves on edge, losing weight fast I was not getting better. Stressing out and not knowing what to expect next I needed help. Roxanne and I both agreed that I needed to go to see doctors that would not treat me like a number or a patient in room #3. My sister works for Dr. Ashraff, the head of medicine in Carthage, NY so it was suggested I go there to get much better personal care.

One two hour plane ride later here I am in NY. Dr. Ashraff and his assistant Lydia visited with me for just under an hour and actually took the time to get details from me based on my logged Doctor visits and symptoms. The consensus was in. Go to the top doctor for MS in Rochester for a consultation and yes more test. However this time no wait, Dr. Ashraff made some phone calls and poof I'm in. Continued next Blog........